Procrastination works, immediately.

Procrastination takes a lot of energy, sometimes more than the task itself. So why do we spend so much energy to do so little? Because it works. Ironically, Procrastination works immediately. When a task matters in a way thats stressful, procrastination on lesser tasks can keep that stress at bay. Here’s how you might change that process.

You see your teen procrastinating, again. They’re putting off the work that makes them feel confused, feckless and anxious. You almost speak up and then, for the same reasons, you don’t act.  You see yourself procrastinating now. The tension in the room thickens; yet nothing has happened. Emotions around schoolwork now take centre stage.

Procrastination helps us manage how we feel about the work at the expense of the work itself. Procrastination isn’t about emotions though; its about anticipating emotions. Putting work off need not feel good. It only needs to reduce the certainty of feeling bad.  One way to help teens manage emotions that lead to procrastination is to reduce the intensity of these moments. The way to do that is to spend some time helping them experience their difficult emotions as if they were a physical object. 

The first step is to pivot the focus. Let go of the urgency to address the procrastination and commit to becoming curious about the feelings that they’re anticipating and pre-emptively avoiding. You might consider asking them to imagine that you both are going to act as detectives looking for clues or scientists describing something the first time. Second, ask questions like these about the feelings and emotion:

1.     When you look at it, what colour is it?

2.     What size is it? The size of a pea, a ball, a car, building or mountain?

3.     What shape is it? Can you see something that resembles it? 

4.     How far in and how high, wide and deep is it?

5.     Where inside you is it located exactly? 

6.     Look at its surface. Is it smooth or rough? Shiny, dull, glossy, matte?

7.     Now if you were to touch it, how would that feel under your fingertips?

8.     If you pressed in on it, would it be spongy, soft, or firm? Would it break or would it retain its shape if squeezed?

9.    What temperature would it be? Hot, warm, room temperature, cool, or cold?

10.  Would there be any movement from it when you touched it?

11.  Would it be vibrating or pulsing or still? If it’s moving, how fast? And what kind of rhythm?

12.  What sound would it make? What pitch and rhythm does that sound have?

Finally, experience the emotion again. This time ask what has changed about it. Ask if the emotion seems the same or different as before. If it feels different, try to get started on the work and pay attention to how it changes again. Stay curious.